There is no dearth of normal people around. Equally, there is no dearth of people who are not in that group of normal people. Every person in the world is unique. If you believe that theory to be true then there is scope for natural and unnatural behavior. In reality, there isn’t anything natural actually. It is a classification used by people to define what is expected or good and what is unexpected or bad. Classifying things into boxes or categories has helped mankind to simplify things. The same is done with different kinds of behavior of men, women and children.
Passive-aggressiveness is a type of behavior which is a borderline case of psychological problems. Not all passive aggressive people are affected by some psychological disorder. But those who have severe symptoms of passive aggressiveness are certainly not absolutely normal.
You will come across a passive aggressive coworker at your workplace and you need to spot them and deal with them in an appropriate manner. Before you can explore the tips for dealing with passive aggressive coworker, you need to know who they are.
Passive aggressive behavior is best defined as a duality or split personality but not because of a complicated psychological condition. It is because of the person’s intent to do something through deceit and duplicity, without making it obvious. A passive aggressive coworker will be very difficult, often unreasonable and discomforting to deal with. They would not come directly at you with their hostility or with their intentions. They would keep the cards close to their chest and play them deceitfully to cause harm. More importantly, a passive aggressive coworker will repeat their actions and reactions over time.
Tips to Dealing with a Passive Aggressive Coworker
Here are some tips for dealing with a passive aggressive coworker.
1. First, you must learn to contain your emotions, actions and reactions. Whatever you say, do, indicate or imply; you must not overreact. The moment you overreact, you are playing at the hands of the passive aggressive coworker. You must not get into any form of personalization; you should not leave any room for speculation or misunderstanding. You must always be lucid in your dealings with them and keep interactions short, sweet and simple.
2. You must always be impersonal with a passive aggressive coworker. Keep your distance which implies emotional disconnect, physical distance and lack of bonhomie. A dearth of interaction with such a coworker will not be harmful. Quite to the contrary, a lot of interactions and pleasantries will lead to some dismay in the end.
3. You should never try to play a role in either managing or curing the coworker’s passive aggressiveness. It is not your job to do anything for them which is anyway beyond your abilities. Regardless of what kind of intervention they are indulging in or if they are not taking any such course at all, you should stay aloof.
4. You should not let a passive aggressive coworker get to your nerves. You should not indulge in a give and take or a tit for tat policy. You must not let the actions or reactions of such a coworker get to your head and then compel you to act or react in a certain way, which will work against you in the near future.
5. Composure and humor work best while dealing with passive aggressive coworker. You should not use humor that is crass and you must not lose your composure and get to any level where you would otherwise normally not tread. Be who you are but treat situations lightheartedly so as to impose a reality that you are least affected by anything beyond work or what is most important at your workplace at a given point in time.
6. Formal communications work best with a passive aggressive coworker. Be serious, proactive and address problems or subjects objectively. There is no need to exaggerate or play things down. Things should be presented as they are but in an impersonal, formal manner. Hence, nothing should be placed in a manner that may become offensive. Instead, things should be kept professional so the passive aggressive coworker realizes that it is work that matters and not personal behaviors or equations amongst the peers.
7. There should always be room for open discussions. Simply because a person or coworker is suffering from passive aggressiveness doesn’t imply that he or she should not get a chance to speak their mind, explain their stand or get a chance to address a problem. However, if there is something out of place, then a second chance is not advisable.
8. Most importantly, there should always be consequences for any actions or reactions of passive aggressiveness and it is those eventualities that would make dealing with passive aggressive coworker comfortable, reasonable and one can enforce cooperation or do away with resistance with relative ease.