Communicating with a narcissist is never easy. It would have been a much simpler and better world had all people been of the exact same nature and psyche but then the world would be boring. That doesn’t justify extreme cases of narcissism but the fact is that there will be a few or many narcissists around you, at your home, work or neighborhood and in your social circle. And, you will have to communicate with them.
Here are some generic tips on communicating with a narcissist. You may have to make some changes depending on what you wish to say, what your intention is and who you are talking to. For instance, one tip may apply to you talking to your friend who may be a narcissist which will have to be amended a little when you speak with a narcissist colleague or boss.
Lessons for Communication with a Narcissist
1. The first lesson you should bear in mind while communicating with a narcissist is to never object or interfere when the person is making his or her point. A narcissist has a closed mind. The only time he or she would listen to anything is when they have something to gain. Hence, any interference or intervention from your end, especially if they are an objection or refute, will spell doom in that session of communication. Try to be polite, be a listener and smile as much as you can just to indicate that you are enjoying the communication. A narcissist likes grandiosity, for himself or herself, but is actually a cynic. If you don’t smile or have an expressionless face, then he or she may suspect something, almost always the worse readings.
2. Make quick, objective arguments or state things precisely when communicating with a narcissist. A narcissist thinks of himself or herself as someone who knows a lot and thus doesn’t need explanations and they also consider their selves to be a great judge. They don’t need to be handheld through a subject or an illustration. Let them understand what you have said and make their opinions after which you should take the communication forward.
3. Always have little to no expectation while communicating with a narcissist and accordingly you should never ask for too much. Don’t flatter a narcissist while talking as that would bloat their ego and you will not get any rewards for being generously flattering. They would think that they deserve the praises, whether they do or even if they don’t.